Didn't Need That

Watching the scooter laid out on the sidewalk with the lights of a fire truck blinding me I thought to how this all started. All I had wanted were some s'mores.

 I was criticizing how Leah refused to eat Hershy's chocolate at our 4th of July BBQ. This installed the desire of chocolate into Rachel as we stood in her kitchen. After she voiced this, Courtney set plans in motion for Rae and I to get all the necessary supplies to make s'mores. I would borrow Courtney's car but this vehicle was very alien to me. I couldn't figure out how to unlock the passenger side door, how to turn on the headlights or how to get the Stereo to stop playing SugarCult songs. After working a few of those kinks, we were ready to roll. 

I've always been a very cautious driver. Never been in an accident and never had gotten a ticket. I was stopped and ready to make a left turn out of the drive way. I looked to my right and saw only headlights in the distance. I was ready to proceed. Rachel pointed through the windshield and yelled "Motorcycle!" I couldn't process her amazement of a motorcycle until a scooter came swerving out of my way. The bike hit the grass and it's rider spilled out onto it. I thought about how I had just killed a man. What was the average sentence for manslaughter in Florida? 19.1 years? That's a lot of rape. I actually considered driving off in my frozen state. I told Rae I didn't know what to do and she advised me to get out of the car. 

His name was Nelson and had delicious intent in mind as well as he left his important. He was going to grab something at Hungry Howie's before returning home to watch the season finale of the Real World: Hollywood. None of us would be making it back in time to see if Joey's cocaine habit had only intensified since leaving the house. A fire truck happened by to see if everyone was alright and called the cops. Nelson wanted a crash report to cover the scratches sustained to his scooter. 

The cop damn near took an hour and a half to arrive and write up his report. I was already vowing to never drive again. After all was said and done I received a citation for $144. I was written up for violation of right-of-way. Which is bullshit considering I didn't hit anyone and wasn't even considered at fault. Nelson apologized, had he known. I told him all was fine. These things happened to everyone and it happened to be my turn. The important thing was Courtney's car was okay. Had it been damaged I would've fled the scene, ditched the car and be writing this blog under the name Palmer Eldritch. 

All that was left was to decide whether to continue on to Wal-Mart for s'mores. Nelson encouraged us. This had started with Rae wanting chocolate and it was going to end with her getting it. Otherwise, I'd feel like I left the house to try and kill a guy and go home. We got the graham crackers, chocolate, marshmallows and some Lemon Berry flavored Hawaiian Punch. We got home and enjoyed the most expensive s'mores I've ever had. Hear this, Officer Blizzard, I'm fighting this ticket. You will rue the day you wrote up your next door savior.